


Obviously Because It's Us

by adorkablephil (kimberly_a)



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Disastrously Awkward Nerds, Established Relationship, Humor, M/M, Wedding Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-15
Updated: 2017-08-15
Packaged: 2018-12-15 18:59:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,531
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11812212
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kimberly_a/pseuds/adorkablephil
Summary: Obviously their wedding day would be like this...





	Obviously Because It's Us

**Author's Note:**

> For @inkyhowlter on Tumblr, who requested “It's Dan and Phil's wedding day but like most events in their life, everything seems to go wrong. Much hilarity and fluff ensues!” I’m not sure if I achieved hilarity, but there is certainly humorous awkwardness. Additional thanks to the treehouse mailing list for their support!

Phil held his small video camera at arm’s length as he lay in bed, waving a hand cheerily and chirping, "Welcome to another Sleepless Night with Phil, night before the wedding edition!"

He looked at the phone on the bedside table, then amended, "Make that **morning** of the wedding edition, because it's 2 a.m. and I haven't been able to sleep a wink. I think it's because Dan's such a romantic he wanted to sleep separately the night before the ceremony, and I can't sleep without him here! So I thought I'd hang out with you guys for a while..."

* * *

Dan woke to the sight of Louise asleep on the other twin bed a few feet away. He didn't think he'd ever seen her without makeup before. She still looked beautiful, but almost not like herself. Like a Louise from another dimension.

She spoke without opening her eyes. "I'm going to tell everyone we slept together the night before your wedding." Then she cracked one eye open to look at him. "I heard you moving around and figured you were awake."

He was glad she'd agreed to stay with him last night. He'd wanted to sleep apart from Phil so that when they saw each other at the ceremony it would feel more dramatic, but then he'd found himself barraged by an attack of nerves. He was lucky to have someone as comforting as Louise standing up with him today. He doubted Phil would get much coddling from Martyn.

"I just thought of something," Dan mused, still lying in his bed. "Phil has his brother standing up with him, and I have my brother. Then Phil also has PJ, and I have you. Doesn't that seem sort of..."

Louise yawned hugely and indelicately, then suggested, "Like you're the bride in this scenario, with me as your Matron of Honor?"

Dan scowled.

"Worried everyone's going to be glancing between you and Phil during the ceremony, speculating about who tops?" She grinned at his scandalized expression.

Dan sputtered. That was sort of what he'd been thinking, though perhaps not in quite those words.

Louise sat up in bed and smoothed her hair, then waved an exquisitely manicured hand dismissively. "Oh, Dan, don't worry." She pushed the duvet aside and got out of the bed wearing pink silk pajamas. "We all stopped taking bets years ago."

She walked into the hotel room's bathroom, leaving Dan with a very red face and a rush of horror.

* * *

"Phil!" A hand was shaking his shoulder insistently. "Wake up, you moron!"

Phil rolled over and pulled the duvet over his head, grumbling, "Lemme sleep, Dan."

He heard a familiar chuckle, but not the one he was expecting. "Hearing you call me Dan is a bit disturbing, little brother. Especially when you're in bed. Speaking of which, why aren't you ready?"

Phil pulled the duvet down to look up to find Martyn standing in his bedroom.

Phil blinked, confused. "What?"

"I'm here to pick you up, doofus! Remember that whole **wedding** thing? The one you spent so many weeks planning? Remember how you were supposed to get up and shower and get dressed before PJ and I showed up so we'd have plenty of time?"

Phil sat up abruptly. "Oh shit! I must have slept through my alarm! I had a lot of trouble falling asleep."

Martyn faked a dreamy expression. "Little Philly swearing on his wedding day. This'll be a romantic story to tell my little nieces and nephews someday."

Phil pushed his annoying brother out of the way, tossed the duvet aside, and jumped to his feet, looking blearily around the room while still half-asleep. Then he remembered to grab his glasses off the bedside table and was at least able to see the room, even if his brain wasn't quite working at full speed yet.

"I found PJ sitting on your front steps, by the way. You're just lucky I have a key to your place. Otherwise you'd probably still be snoring peacefully in dreamland while Dan was waiting for you at the altar, thinking he'd been jilted."

* * *

"You didn't bring toothpaste?"

"Don't hotels always have toothpaste?"

"No, Dan, they don't. I can't believe with all the traveling you do you didn't think to bring toothpaste. Are you going to give Phil your first kiss as wedded husbands with that breath? He's going to make his funny bleggggh face, right there in front of everyone, you know."

"Jesus, Louise! It's not like I smell of rancid meat or something!"

"Daniel, my dear friend, I'm sorry to tell you this, but a man can't accurately smell his own breath. This is a case in point."

"Well, what the hell am I supposed to do? I don't have any toothpaste! There's no shop in this hotel. Maybe there's a concierge I could call or something..."

Louise smiled smugly. "Luckily, you have a Matron of Honor instead of a Best Man. I will give you a moment to finally fully appreciate the reason we ladies always carry purses." She produced a small case from within her bag. "It's so we are prepared for any eventuality."

"You had toothpaste in your bag this whole time?" Dan demanded in disbelief. Louise just shrugged. "And yet you've been letting me freak out about it for 10 minutes?" He stared at her.

She shrugged again, then smiled. "You're cute when you're crazed." She patted him on the shoulder. "Now, there's a little toothbrush in there and a tube of toothpaste, so go help yourself." As Dan grabbed the case from her and turned to flee into the bathroom she called after him, "But if you use the toothbrush, for god's sake don't bother to give it back! I'll buy a new one!"

* * *

PJ lounged casually against the kitchen counter, his feet crossed at the ankle, mismatched socks barely visible between his dress shoes and the cuff of his trousers. He was playing with two action figures he'd found somewhere and paying little attention to the drama unfolding before him.

Martyn rolled his eyes. "Don't tell me you spilled coffee on your jacket. The jacket you bought to wear to your actual **wedding** , Phil. You spilled coffee on your **wedding** jacket?"

"Well, I hadn't had my coffee yet!" Phil wailed.

"You spilled your coffee because you hadn't had your coffee?"

"Yes!" Phil flailed his arms helplessly, looking like a giant toddler about to burst into tears. He grabbed a tea towel and blotted the stain frantically, but he still smelled distinctly of caffeinated beverage.

He knew how much Dan loved coffee, but he probably didn't want to **marry** one.

"I'll wear the jacket from the BONCAs," he declared, then glanced nervously at Martyn and PJ to see how this idea would be received.

PJ held up a Captain America figurine and intoned in a deep voice, "I believe in you, Phil!"

Phil raced out of the room.

* * *

"What's the point in love or marriage when we're all just hurtling toward inevitable doom..."

Louise interrupted him again, for the fourth or fifth—possibly eighth—time. "Dan, if you don't get up off that carpet you're going to ruin the line of those trousers."

"Fuck!" This time it worked. Dan leapt off the floor faster than should have been physically possible for someone with his dismal level of fitness and peered down at his especially fine suit, asking Louise anxiously, "Do they still look okay?"

* * *

Phil arrived at the venue with Martyn and PJ, only to find that all their friends and family were already there, waiting, chatting amongst themselves and looking around in expectant confusion. He was slightly late due to the morning's series of disasters.

But where was Dan?

* * *

"Why does this always happen to me?" Dan grumbled. "Why do I always get the cab driver who has no idea where he's going?"

Louise patted Dan's knee and said comfortingly, "It doesn't **always** happen to you." Dan gave her a look and she smiled. "Just more often than it happens to everyone else."

* * *

Phil paced anxiously. The ceremony had been intended to start half an hour ago.

PJ looked up from his phone. "Louise says they're stuck in traffic."

Phil threw himself into a chair, simultaneously exhausted from his night of little sleep and filled with nervous energy. He jumped back up and began pacing again.

* * *

Finally standing at the altar, hoping he didn't stink of nervous sweat and dubiously-maintained London taxi, Dan gazed at Phil's beloved face ... then noticed what his soon-to-be-husband was wearing.

That wasn't the jacket they'd bought together for the wedding—it was the slightly glittery one Phil had worn to the BONCAs. It didn't exactly match his trousers.

He flicked his gaze questioningly back to Phil's anxious face and their eyes met.

Dan forgot about sweat and taxis and jackets and awards ceremonies and just smiled softly, and he saw Phil relax and respond with a sweet smile of his own.

It didn't matter how they got here. They were here now, and this was where they belonged. Obviously. The two of them, together. Nothing else mattered.

He took Phil's hand and they turned to face the celebrant.

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you liked it! If so, leave kudos or even a comment & I'll love you forever. Check out my other DnP fics on this site if you're interested.
> 
> And, as always, I can also be found on Tumblr as [adorkablephil](http://adorkablephil.tumblr.com/) and Twitter as [stilladorkable](https://twitter.com/stilladorkable). Feel free to stop by and say hello!


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